In 1175, immediately after his release, William of Scotland made a law for the repression of theft after the English model, but much more drastic. It was, in the terms of the assize of Clarendon in 1166, enacted by Henry II., that any man de famed as a malefactor by the oath of twelve lawful men of the hundred and four men of any vill, was to go to the ordeal of water. William's en actment was a stronger measure. Whoever was accused of theft or theft bote — that is, com pounding with a thief or sharing his plunder — might, on oath of the bailie or grieve and three other leal men of the vill, be taken and made to underly the ordeal of water. But if to these four oaths the oaths of three old men were superadded, instant execution followed without either ordeal or battle.
FACETI/E. Mr. Jasper. Jedge, I wants to pucchase de ve'y stronges' kin' e' 'vorce papers dat you 'm got in the cote. Judge. Divorce papers, eh? Have you and your wife had trouble? Mr. J. No, sah! Dar 'd be a little prebious un'er de suckemstanzas, cos we haid't done been tuk inter de shackles er mattermony yit. Judge. What! Not married yet, and asking for divorce papers? Mr. J. Dat 's de case, Jedge; but yo' see I 'm gwinter take a partner nex' week, an' weze ten'in' to mobe ober in the lowlan's whar cotes iz mighty sca'se, an' I wants deze papers whar I kin lay mer han's on 'em. I 'm oner deze precautionous citerzens, Jedge, dat berlebes in de maxiums, "In timer peace, prepar' for war," an' I prefers ter hab deze dockerinen's whar I kin forwif 'bolish de lady wid dim ef she done grow rantankerous. OP Parson Widemouf hain't been proach dat Foolish Vargin case ter me fo' nuffin. an' I wants to gyard merse'f ergin de same 'speunce.
An old man was on the witness stand, and was being cross-examined by the lawyer. "You say you are a doctor, sir?" "Yes, sir; yes, sir." "What kind of a doctor?" "I makes intments, sir, I makes intments." " What 's your ointment
good for?" "It's good to rub strengthen the mind." "What have if you were to rub some of "None at all, sir; none at all. something to start with."
on the head to effect would it it on my head?" We must have-
An old Maine judge who was a stern Prohibitionist was once trying a case in which a certain man was accused of selling liquor. Everybody, including the judge, was morally certain that the man was guilty, but on the evidence the jury felt obliged to acquit him. On hearing the verdict the judge arose and remarked : " It is evident by the goings on in this village that some one is selling. I 'll fine you #10 and costs," he added, turning to the prisoner; " and if I ever hear of your selling again I will send you to jail."
"Do you know the value of an oath? " asked the judge of the old darkey who was to be the next witness. "Yes, sah, I does. One oh dese yeah lawyers done gib me foali dollars fob to swear to suffin. Dat 's de value of an oath. Foah dollars, sah." And then there was consternation in the court room. Judge Duffy. And you saw the prisoner strike the complainant? Witness. Yes, your honor. Judge. And had he given him provocation? Witness. Why, you see he pulled out a roll of bills. Judge. And you mean to say the prisoner struck him for that. Witness. Well, he struck him for some of it.
"No." said the condemned, " I don't think much of your judges; there "s nothing polite or gentlemanly about 'em, you know. There 's Re corder Smyth, for instance. He gets me into his court and asks me, ' Are you guilty, or not guilty? ' And when I tells him, ' Not guilty,' instead of taking my word, as one gentleman should take another's, he goes to work and leaves it to a dozen fellows that never knew me a second in all their lives. 'T ain't square, that's what I say; and 't ain't good manners, neither."
