Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 09.pdf/329

This page needs to be proofread.
The Green Bag.

to laugh at the wit and humor of their asso the legal maxim in England established by ciates, without themselves tickling the ribs a poet: " Rogues must hang that jurymen of Momus. Judges Daly and Van Brunt are may dine." the champion postprandials of the New York Judge Pryor, being at chambers, over Supreme Bench. heard a disappointed lawyer, whose motion One of the best mots is recorded of Judge he had just rejected, say, in an intended Van Brunt, who, being surprised by a brother sotto vocc, " His honor's rulings are mere justice, laughing heartily over a new calf toss-up of a dollar," and retorted with his skin-bound book, and being asked, " Whence grim smile, " But heads (tapping his own) your mirth?" answered, "The laws of the and Liberty win the toss-up." last session, just issued and full of comic Judge Gildersleeve, at the annual dinner of novelties." the sheriff's jury, being importuned too A witness who was very prolix, and tested much by an officious fellow guest at his the patience of the bench, jury, and even the elbow to take more wine, retorted, in counsel who had called him, was suddenly declining, " You are a judge of wine; but asked by Judge Joseph F. Daly, " What is the law I am judge of is not, this evening, your business?" He answered, " I lead the very dry." orchestra at a Music Hall." " I thought," Among Judge Dugro's puns, this is men responded the Judge, with a weary look at tioned. He had ordered a non-suit, and a the court-room clock, " that you must be an juror timidly asking what was meant by a non-suit, the Judge answered, " It means expert at beating time." Judge McAdam, from his familiarity with a ninny suit case — one without legal divorce law, is usually assigned to hear mari sense." Upon another occasion, handing back an tal quarrels. On one occasion, a prolix law offered affidavit after he had read it, he said, yer, seeking divorce for a wife, kept contin ually repeating, " And yet, your honor, God " Imperfect and foolish, and appropriately had joined them." Judge McAdam, inter written on foolscap paper." In dismissing a rupting him, asked, " Was this couple mar suit for assault and battery on shipboard ried in church?" The affirmative being just outside the county water boundary, for given, the Judge said, " And yet you ask me want of jurisdiction, he remarked to the law to contradict the solemn words of the mar yer bringing it, " You ought to have seen that this was malum in sea. riage service, and put them asunder." Judge Barrett is litterateur as well as jurist, On another occasion he interrupted a pro lix lawyer with, "Time for luncheon, coun and has composed romances and plays, and selor," and, looking at the jury, added, " I he often quotes poetry. On one occasion, am not the Adam of the Catechism, by in charging the jury in a telephone damage whom all men die, but an Adam by whom case, he revived a quartet very happily, thus : — some may dine." Justice Barrett was often apportioned to That steed called Lightning — say the Fates, try murder cases, and once, in closing court Is owned in the United States. at dinner hour, said, " We will adjourn fur 'Twas Franklin's hand that caught the horse, ther testimony until morning, and respect Whose harness came from Doctor Morse.