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A GENTLEMAN who had a suit in chancery was called upon by his counsel to put in his answer, for fear of incurring a contempt. " Well," says the client, " why is not my answer put in then?" "How should I draw your answer," saith the lawyer, " without knowing what you can swear?" "Hang your scruples," says the client again; "pray do your part of a lawyer, and draw me a sufficient answer; and let me alone to do the part of a gentleman, and swear it." AN eminent judge of the C. P. Four Courts, having been called on at a public dinner for a song, regretted that it was not in his power to gratify the company. A wag who was present, observed that he was much surprised by the re fusal of the learned judge, as it was notorious that a great number of persons had been " trans ported by his voice."
AT one time it fell to the lot of Lord Morris to hear a case at Coleraine, in which damages were claimed from a veterinary surgeon for hav ing poisoned a valuable horse. The issue de pended upon whether a certain number of grains of a particular drug could be safely administered to the animal. The dispensary doctor proved that he had often given eight grains to a man, from which it was to be inferred that twelve for a horse was not excessive. "Never mind yer eight grains, docther," said the judge. " We all know that some poisons are cumulative in effect, and ye may go to the edge of ruin with impunity. But tell me this : The twelve grains — would n't they kill the divil himself if he swallowed them?" The doctor was annoyed and pompously re plied, " I don't know, my lord, I never had him for a patient." From the bench came the answer, " Ah, no, docther, ye niver had, more 's the pity I The old bhoy 's still aloive."
NOTES.
PETER THE GREAT was opposed to litigation. A GOOD story is told of one of the justices of the United States Supreme Court. He was try He issued an edict that no trial should last to exceed eleven days. ing to get into his gown and Mr. Justice was assisting him. His hand in some manner A LAWYER making his will bequeathed his es got caught in the robe and the gown stuck. "Hang it! " he exclaimed. " The devil 's in tate to fools and madmen, " for," said he, '.' from the thing." "Oh, no," said Justice . such I had it, and to such I give it." "You have n't half got into it." HARGRAVE, the English commentator, is cred JUDGE (to prisoner who has been captured in ited with having said : " Any lawyer who writes a raid on a gambling house) : " What is your so clearly as to be understood is an enemy to his profession." occupation?" PRISONER: " I am a locksmith, your honor." IN the reign of Henry IV., courts were held JUDGE: "How did you happen to be found in a gambling house, and what were you doing at Dorking every three weeks, and there are in stances of suits lasting six months, and resulting when the police appeared?" PRISONER: "I was making a bolt for the in damages of four pence and costs of twelve pence. door."
