Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 14.pdf/95

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The Green Bag.

REGRETS. By Mr. Jus tice .

, on being invited to the play.

I HOPE you'll not complain if I Decline, with thanks, your kind "invite." Let me explain the reason why I'll not attend the play to-night. A tragedy, you say, they'll act, With stirring scenes of love and war; The same effect I'll get, in fact, And yet not go one half so far. I'll take me down from off the shelf The General Statutes of the State, And revel, then, all by myself, In plays of men who legislate. With Declaiming Tarquin from stridestheI'llcivil walkcode, the floor, Reciting loudly, o'er and o'er, The tragic laws of fence and road. I'll shiver at the felon's fate, And read the words so free from doubt, Which made him labor for the State For years—or till he's pardoned out. 'Tis strange no actor of this age, (At least, so far as I'm advised), Has set these Statutes for the stage, And had their sections dramatized. The That dramatist in this solemn must not compilation suppose He'll Show findonly rich injokes its application. and fun, for thosa