THE LIGHTER SIDE a long while Judge Banks sat in his office and wondered what a law client looked like. He would read and stud}' to pass the long hours away. Every time he heard footsteps in the hall he would straighten up, assume an air of knowledge, and wait, only to be disappointed. One day an old negro woman entered his office. "Is yo' de lawyah man?" she asked. Judge Banks immediately was all attention. This surely was a client. He answered in the affirmative. "Well, sah," said the old woman, " Ah wants ter ax yo' device. Now, yo' see, Ah owes rent on ma house. Ah kain't pay hit, en de lan'lord say he gwine put me out nex' week ef Ah doan' fotch 'round the cash. What's Ah gwine ter do, Mistah lawyah man?" Judge Banks gave himself over to deep study for a moment. Then he told the old woman that, with due process of law, the landlord could be compelled to give her a month's notice. The first client was de lighted. "Well, now, young man," she said, " Ah's mighty much erbliged ter you. Yo' suhtinly es smaht. Good mohnin'!" "Hold on," came from the young lawyer. "Haven't you forgotten something?" "How's dat? " asked the old negress. " Did Ah done drapped somethin'?" "No," said Judge Banks, " but my fee is five dollars. You must pay me for that ad vice." The old negress hesitated. Then she took hold of the doorknob. "Mistah," she said. " Ah doan' want yo' ole device. Keep hit. Dat rent ain't but foah dollahs." And out she went. — Denver Post. A Jury of the Vicinage. — Dr. Charles H. Parkhurst of New York city said recently, in discussing some phases of corruption in that city: " I declare, when I see some of the deceit that exists about one, I can almost sympathize with the jury in the Jerome Ess case. You have heard of that case? No? Well, Jerome Ess, a Western man, was noted for his mendac ity. It was impossible to believe him, impossi ble to trust him. He got, finally, in the toils
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of the law, and at his trial he pleaded guilty. He did well to plead guilty, for the case against him was strong and irrefutable. Nevertheless, the jury in its verdict declared him innocent. The judge was thunderstruck. ' Innocent: Innocent: But the man himself pleads guilty: ' ' We know it, your honor,' said the foreman of the jury; ' but he's such a liar that we can't believe him.' " — Exchange. Too Clever. — " When Chief Justice Chase, a man of great abilities and marked character istics, was presiding in one of the country courts of Vermont, an appeal case from a justice's court came up before him so small and contemptible in its origin that he ordered it stricken from the docket. The case was where a turkey had trespassed upon the garden of a neighbor and got shot for its depredations. The owner brought suit to recover damages, and, failing before the justice, had appealed the case. Judge Chase was angry, and when he ordered the case from the docket said: "' The lawyer who consented to appeal this case ought to be thrown from the window of the courtroom. Why didn't he have the case referred to some of the honest neighbors for settlement? ' "' Because, your honor,' retorted the attor ney, getting hot under the collar, ' it was our intention not to let honest people have any thing to do with it.' "True, this was a neat retort, but it cost the lawyer just an even $50 for contempt of court." Webster's Brandy. — Mr. Webster's fond ness for brandy gave one of his important clients a very bad twenty-four hours. He was called to Philadelphia to defend the Good year rubber patents and the head of the firm met him at the station. When they had en tered the carriage, he at once turned to Mr. Webster and referred to one feature of the evidence to be presented in the trial the fol lowing day. "I speak of it, Mr. Webster," he said, " as it has a peculiarly important bearing on the case, and I thought you might not have under stood its significance." Mr. Webster, who was looking dreamily out of the carriage window, was recalled to a con
