Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 25.pdf/300

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The Editor's Bag 'until you are dead. And may God have mercy on your soul.' That, Mr. Green, concludes the duty of the court; and I trust that you and your family will observe that in all these proceedings the court is compelled by the law to act to perform this function, and that the court itself is in nowise responsible for the law, or for the action of the jury which resulted in this painful — painful to the court — proceeding. And now, Mr. Green, the court wishes you a very good afternoon."

TO A those STATEMENT that have OF difficulty CLAIM in pre paring more specific statements of claim, especially in the Municipal Court of Chicago, the following article may give a cue to the situation : — "An artist who was employed to renovate and retouch the great oil paintings in an old church in Belgium, rendered a bill of $67.30 for his services. The church wardens, however, required an itemized bill, and the following was duly presented, audited and paid: — "For correcting the Ten Commandments "Renewing Heaven and adjusting stars "Touching up Purgatory and restor ing lost souls "Brightening up the flames of Hell, putting new tail on the Devil, and doing odd jobs for the damned . . "Putting new stone in David's sling, enlarging head of Goliath "Mending shirt of Prodigal Son and cleaning his ear "Embellishing Pontius Pilate and putting new ribbon on his bonnet "Putting new tail and comb on St. Peter's rooster "Re-pluming and re-gilding left wing of the Guardian Angel "Washing and putting the servant carmineof onHigh his Priest cheek

"Putting earrings in Sarah's ears. . . . "Decorating Noah's ark and new head on Shem "Total

5.26 4.31

$67.30" — English Weekly.

A FATAL ANSWER A REPRESENTATIVE in Congress tells of an experience when, as an attorney for the defendant, he was examining the complainant in a certain case. His client, one Wheelock, had got into a quarrel with a certain McDonald, during their negotiations for the trade of horses. The quarrel had gone so far that McDonald had made application to a magistrate to have Wheelock bound over to keep the peace, alleging that he had threatened to do him, McDonald, bodily injury. When the case was called, McDonald testified to the circumstances under which Wheelock had threatened him. The cross-examination began. "Now, Mr. McDonald," the lawyer said, "you declare that you are under the fear "I of am,bodily sir." harm?"

$5.12 7.14 3.06 7.17 6.13 3.39 3.02 2.20 5.18 5.02

"Taking the spots off the son of Tobias 10.30

"You are even afraid for your life?" "I am, sir." "Then you freely admit that Wheelock can whip you, Pat McDonald?" The question aroused McDonald's "Irish" instantly. "Bill Wheelock whip me? Never!" he shouted. "I can whip him and any half dozen like him!" "That will do, Mr. McDonald," said the attorney. The court was already in a roar, and the lawyer rested the case without further testimony or argument. The case was dismissed, for it was evident that McDonald could not be under seri ous bodily fear of a man whom, in his own opinion, he had only to use oneseventh of his strength to whip.