RODERICK HUDSON
should see some fruits of the alliance. I should like to be a grandee—the Prince is, among many wonderful things hereditary Grand d'Espagne—and I think I should be a very good one; I would play my part well. I 'm fond of luxury, I 'm fond of a great society, I 'm fond of being looked at, I thrill with the idea of high consideration. Mamma, you see, has never had any. There I am in all my native horror. I 'm corrupt, corrupting, corruption! Ah, what a pity that could n't be too! Mercy of heaven!" Her voice had a convulsion; she covered her face with her hands and sat motionless. Rowland saw that an intense agitation, hitherto successfully repressed, underlay her fine pretence of finality, and he could easily believe her battle had been fierce. She rose quickly and turned away, walked a few paces and stopped. In a moment she was before him again, her air confessing at once to her pride and her humility. "But you need n't think I'm afraid!" she said. "I've chosen, and I shall hold to it. I Ve something here, here, here!" and she patted her heart. "It 's my own. I sha'n't part with it. Is it what you call in Boston one's higher self? I don't know; I don't care! It's bigger and brighter than the Casamassima diamonds—every one of which, if you please, I 've seen and handled and adored."
"You say that certain things are your own affair," Rowland presently rejoined; "but I must nevertheless make an attempt to learn what all this means—what it promises for my friend Hudson. Is there any hope for him?"
407
