yet so mince it as to make way for your own escape, lest, instead of awakening others, you lay that guilt upon your own soul that you will never get from under.
295. But I thank the Lord I have been kept from consenting to these so 'horrid suggestions, and have rather, as Samson, bowed myself with all my might to condemn sin and transgression wherever I found it—Yea, though therein also I did bring guilt upon my own conscience. "Let me die," thought I, "with the Philistines" (Judges xvi. 30), rather than deal corruptly with the blessed Word of God. Thou that teachest another, teachest not thou thyself? It is far better to judge thyself, even by preaching plainly unto others, than that then, to save thyself, imprison the truth in unrighteousness. Blessed be God for his help also in this.
296. I have also, while found in this blessed work of Christ, been often tempted to pride and liftings up of heart; and though I dare not say I have not been affected with this, yet truly the Lord of his precious mercy hath so carried it towards me, that for the most part I have had but small joy to give way to such a thing: for it hath been my every day's portion to be let into the evil of my own heart, and still made to see such a multitude of corruptions and infirmities therein, that it hath caused hanging down of the head under all my gifts and attainments. I have felt this thorn in the flesh the very mercy of God to me. (2 Cor. xii. 7–9.)
297. I have also had, together with this, some notable place or other of the Word presented before me, which word contained in it some sharp and piercing sentence concerning the perishing of the soul, notwithstanding gifts and parts: as, for instance, that hath been of great use to me, "Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal" (1 Cor. xiii 1).
298. A tinkling cymbal is an instrument of music with which a skilful player can make such melodious and heart-
