312 POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OP
" I wish you'd let me bleed you/' said Mr. Bfeiijamin with great eager- ness.
" No, thauk you," feplied Mr. Winkle hurriedly.
" I really think yoU had better," said Allen.
«' Thank you," replied Mr. Winkle ; " I'd rather not."
" W hat do you think, Mr. Pickwick ? " enquired Bob Sawyer.
Mr. Pickwick was excited and indignant. He beckoned to Mr. Wel- ler, and said in a stern voice, " Take his skaits off."
" No ; but really I had scarcely begun," remonstrated Mr. Winkle.
" Take his skaits off," repeated Mr. Pickwick firmly.
The command was not to be resisted. Mr. Winkle allowed Sam to obey it, in silence.
<' Lift him up," said Mr. Pickwick. Sam assisted him to rise.
Mr. Pickwick retired a few paces apart from the by-standers ; and, beckoning his friend to approach, fixed a searching look upon him, and uttered in a low, but distinct and emphatic tone, these remarkable words :
" You're a humbug. Sir."
" A what !^' said Mr. Winkle, starting.
" A humbug, Sir. I will speak plainer, if you wish it. An impostor, Sir."
With these words, Mr. Pickwick turned slowly on his heel, and rejoined his friends.
While Mr. Pickwick was delivering himself of the sentiment just recorded, Mr. Weller and the fat boy, having by their joint endeavours cut out a slide, were exercising themselves thereupon, in a very masterly and brilliant manner. Sam Weller, in particular, was displaying that beautiful feat of fancy sliding which is currently denominated " knock- ing at the cobbler's door," and which is achieved by skimming over the ice on one foot, and occasionally giving a two-penny postman's knock upon it, with the other. It was a good long slide, and there was some- thing in the motion which Mr. Pickwick, who was very cold with stand- ing still, could not help envying.
" It looks a nice warm exercise that, doesn't it?" he enquired of Wardle, when that gentleman was thoroughly oiit of breath, by reason of the indefatigable manner in which he had converted his legs into a pair of compasses, and drawn complicated problems on the ice.
'* Ah, it does, indeed," replied Wardle. " Do you slide ?"
- ' I used to do so, on the gutters, when I was a boy," replied Mr.
Pickwick.
" Try it now," said Wardle.
" Oh do, please, Mr. Pickwick," cried all the ladies.
" I should be very happy to afford you any amusement," replied Mr. Pickwick, " but I haven't done such a thing these thirty years."
"Pooh! pooh! nonsense!" said Wardle, dragging off his skaits with the impetuosity which characterised all his proceedings. " Here; I'll keep you company ; come along." And away went the good tem- pered old fellow down the slide, with a rapidity which came very close upon Mr. Weller, and beat the fat boy all to nothing.
