RUSSIAN GARLAND
asked where the fool was. He was lying on the stove, and answered: "What is it you want with me?" "How!" said the officer, "what do I want with you? Get up this instant and dress yourself; I must take you to the King." But Emelyan said: "What to do?" Whereat the officer became so enraged at the rudeness of his replies that he hit him on the cheek. "At the pike's command, and at my desire," said the fool, "up, cudgel, and thrash them!" Instantly up sprang the cudgel and began to lay about it on all sides. So the officer was obliged to go back to the town as fast as he could; and when he came before the King, and told him how the fool had cudgelled him, the King marvelled greatly, and would not believe the story.
Then the King called to him a wise man and ordered him to bring the fool by craft, if nothing else would do; so the wise man went to the village where Emelyan lived, called the Starosta before him and said: "I am ordered by the King to take your fool; and therefore ask for the persons with whom he lived." Then the Starosta ran and fetched Emelyan's sisters-in-law. The King's messenger asked them what it was the fool liked, and they answered: "Noble sir, if anyone entreats our fool earnestly to do anything, he flatly refuses the first
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