be called not "telephone," but "tell-a-fib," as that was its chief function.
He was intensely Catholic and always flaunted the banner of his religion. "Religion," he writes in this volume, "is one of the ideal forces that make men good citizens and gallant soldiers." And again, "If soldiers will not fight on an empty stomach, still less will they fight on an empty soul." Perhaps because he loved his faith, so he could afford to take it humorously at times. I remember once his throwing off in an epigram the difference between the Catholic and Protestant religions. "The Catholics take their beliefs table d'hôte," he said, "and the Protestants theirs à la carte." What chiefly appealed to him in Catholicity was its mystery and its gospel of mercy. If he often quoted Heine's well-known semi-cynical "Dieu me pardonnera, c'est son métier," it was because he felt an amazed gratitude that a God should choose such an original profession. He greatly liked the society of Irish priests. He used to say they were gentlemen first, and priests after. They, too, loved him, and took his gentle chaff as it was meant. I remember how a priest friend of his enjoyed a sermon for golfers which Tom composed for him. Needless to say it was never preached. In it golfers were enjoined to "get out of the bunker of mortal sin with the niblick of Confession." During the Dublin strike an anti-*cleric was railing against the priests, who had in-
