be entirely possess'd with this train of thoughts, sometimes judicious, but always melancholy.
I confess there is a certain time when the wisest action we can do, is to quit the World: but as fully persuaded as I am of this truth, I should infinitely sooner be directed by Nature to retirement, than by my Reason. 'Tis by the impulse of the former, that in the midst of the World, I live now after such a fashion, as if I were retir'd out of it. I still continue in it, as far as I seek what pleases me; and am still out of it, as far as I avoid whatever incommodes me there. Every day I steal away from acquaintances that weary, and conversations that tire me. Every day I entertain my self in a sweet Commerce with my Friends, and find the most sensible pleasure in their company.
After my way of living, I neither enjoy a full Society, nor a perfect Retirement. 'Tis only an innocent confining of my self to those delights, which best agree with my inclinations. Disgusted with gross Vice, and offended by the practice of too rigid Virtue, I possess all those harmless pleasures that are most suitable to the repose of old Age, and affect me in proportion to what I am capable of relishing with satisfaction.
And Life's decreasing lamp does feebly burn,
Nature to innocence inclin'd,
Pursues the pleasures of the mind:
And she, whose fierce impetuous heat
Fir'd ev'ry vein, now seeks a blest Retreat.
'Tis true, when Love's no more,
