Page:Whole proceedings of Jockey and Maggy (3).pdf/19

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Jock. A what needed I do the like, when she an my mither did it a' but the wean getting, she could na do that.

Mess John. Indeed John, you seem to have been a parcel of loose livers altogether.

Jock. A loose, stir, I wish I were loose yet, better be louse than bun to an ill stake.

Mess John. I see it is needless for me to inquire any further into the matter. I find you out guilty, therefore you must appear publicly on the stool of repentance on Sabbath next, and the two following thereafter, or ye be absolved from the scandal.

Jock. Indeed master minister, I am very easy about repentance, and for your stool, it's a seat am very indifferent abou', for I'm but bashful and as I was never guilty of getting bystarts, before or sin syne, cxcept in thoughts, words, deeds and actions, I think you may e'en let me pess, I suffered enough wi' the clash o' the kintry, and loss o' my ain wean; it was nae bystart, ye canna gar me stand for that.

Mess John. You appear to be such a stupid fellow, the like o' you should neither have lawful child nor bystart, and I admire that such an idiot as you was allowed to be married to any woman; and you James, who is elder of that proportion, should have given information of this man's capacity, before he was joined to a wife.

Elder. Indeed sir, ye ken very well he answered the questions at the examine better than any other fouks, and I think hc is best married, for he might a gotten more bystarts and a fash'd us.

Jock. Indeed stir, it's very true, for when ance I got the gate o' women, I coudna bide aff them; but our Maggy was unco cunnen, she wadna let me do naething but kiss her an kittle her, till ance we was married.

Mess John. I'll ask no more questions at him: call in his mother, (In she comes), Goodwife, we have ordered your son to appear three Sabbaths on the stool, and there to be reproved before the congregation publicly, and be absolved from the scandal.

Moth. Then the ill thief be in his a-se, Mess John, gin e'er he set a hip upon't; my bairn on your black-stool! and wadna't be a great blunder on the auld black face o't, to my son to gang on't before the young laird, who has had twa bystarts an never set a hip on't yet, and he's continually riding on the hissies to this day, and them that wadna let him, he rives their duds, and kicks their doups. A dear Mess John, an ye gie gentle fouk a toleration to whore,