4534960Poems — Uncle Joe's SoliloquyClara A. Merrill
UNCLE JOE'S SOLILOQUY
Talk about your new inventions And the wonders of the age; I think the pesky foolishness Has reached the topmost stage! The news that this here world is round Comes from some great man's mouth— And that 'tis hung onto a pole That goes from North to South.
And I suppose that this here way Is the way to solve the riddle— Just take an apple up, and thrust A needle through the middle. And what is it they won't do next? For now, Why, 'pon my soul They say that larn'ed folks have tried To find the great North Pole!
I'd rather stay upon the land Than sail upon the sea; Why can't them folks just stay at home And let the North Pole be? Now I am kind of worried like For fear some of those men That 's sailing round and round the airth Will find the pole and then
Some of them chaps who thoughtlessly At common sense will scoff Will take it into their wise heads To cut the North Pole off! And then what would become of us? I'm sure I haint no notion— I spose that we, the world and all Would fall into the Ocean!
And what a bad thing that would be— How dreadful is the sound— To let the world fall in the sea And all the good folks drown'd! I wish that them ere pesky folks Would let the pole alone; I think that they had better find Some business of their own!
I wish some one would find them folks And try and make them see That they had better stay at home And let the North Pole be! If I should ever see them men As sure's my name is Joe They'll find what my opinion is And I shall tell them so!
