Punch/Volume 147/Issue 3828/Strategic Disease

Punch, Volume 147, Issue 3828 (October 28th, 1914)
Strategic Disease by Arthur Kidd
4259019Punch, Volume 147, Issue 3828 (October 28th, 1914) — Strategic DiseaseArthur Kidd

[Some of the German military authorities having explained that their retreat from Paris was due to the spread of cholera in that city, we may perhaps expect to have something like the following further "explanations" elsewhere.]

Our recent rather smart retreat
From Warsaw need not cause disquiet;
Our army met with no defeat
Nor suffered from defective diet;
We marched away because we knew
Warsaw was reeking with the 'Flu.

Our move from Calais was, of course,
A great strategic retrogression,
We were compelled, though not by force,
To leave another in possession;
But that's no ground for doleful dumps,
Calais was chucked because of Mumps.

Soon we shall see, though scarce as yet,
Huns and howitzers hustled over
Yon nauseous streak of heaving wet
Which still divides our arms from Dover;
And should "high failure" then occur
Lay the whole blame on Mal-de-mer.