Reflections upon some Persons and Things in Ireland (1660)
by William Petty
Postscript (pages 142 - 153)
2445934Reflections upon some Persons and Things in Ireland — Postscript (pages 142 - 153)1660William Petty

POSTSCRIPT.

SIR,

IF you would know why I have been so free of my Epithites, on Knight Hierome and his Squire Worsly: I tell you, That this Apozeme or Julip[1] of argumentations, wherewith I am to contemperate the malice and mistakes of Men, and resist as well the putrefaction of Sir Hieroms Clamors, as the malignity of Worslyes whispers must have some Sales, some drops of spirit of Vitriol, to give it a grata aciditas, And to make it more effectuall for the above-mentioned purposes; and if you wonder why I that seem still under Sir Hieromes lash, and may by him bee questioned in a third or thirteenth Parliament, he having the trick of turning out all those which will not serve his turn: I say, if you wonder why I should do any thing to exasperate him, being in so tonitruating and fulgurating[2] a condition as we now behold him; I answer,

1. That how great soever his malice, power and opportunity to hurt me, should be, as in that strange return of the Parliament it was, when my Adversaries thought the spirit of those in power was full of wrath and revenge, against a Single Person, and the Cromwel Family, (unto both which they were told I was a friend) yet he, with his Jackal Worsley so poorly managed their business, as that in the Opinion of the ablest Lawyers, I could not have been forced to have answered their Charge in Ireland: nor did they with all their devices hinder me of being acquit by the Act of Indempnity, even although I had been guilty of more villany, then they charged me with.

2ly, You must understand, that the oftner I am troubled in this manner, the more will their reckoning (which must be one day paid) be enflamed.

3ly, I never feared a Tryal, as having first provoked the seven Officers unto it, and waved my priviledge as a Member of parliament to that purpose: moreover, when I was summoned to the Parliament in England, I readily went and appeared before the time; delivered none of my Ingratiatory Letters, till I had first spoken my self. Besides, when the Parliament was revived, and though I was satisfied they were made full of prejudice against me, I came in the height of all, to appear before them; which my Adversaries perceiving, got me remanded into Ireland. I ever contemned what could be said, nor much feared what could be done against me: 'tis true, I did fear (a) Vid. Explic.(a) byassing Judges: But I always hoped my Tryal would be publick, so as I doubted not to save my Credit, even though I lost my Estate. I feared my defences might not be hearkned to, but I resolved if Reason took no place, to lay it on with (b) Vid. Explic.(b) Noise, repetition and inculcation, until my Judges had, or at least might have understood me. I did not doubt but that my lands might be retrenched, but I considered they would not be carried away: for there being more farms in Ireland then Tenants, and great choice of bargains; men would rather take where they need not fear twice paying of their Rents; and withal, that the people in general in their hearts understanding the justice of my Cause, and the cruelties used towards me, would not by their forwardness to meddle with my Land, give any countenance to my enemies. Moreover, I feared my personal Estate might be seized: But I knew, that unless arbitrary power in my Judges had conspired with the universal apostacy and knavery of all my friends, they could not hinder me of a small Bush to stand under, till the shower was over; especially since I never yet would trouble myself with pompous appearance, nor further delighted in the courses of common voluptuaries, then to understand them: so as paucity of wants would have been unto me as riches, when my abundance had been pared off. Lastly, They might have imprisoned my person;A House in Dublin, where the Office was kept. but what had that been to me, who have always imprisoned my self? and what was the life of a Goal worse, then I endured at the Crows-nest? I delight in few things which a Prison will deny me: Perhaps I could have been able to buy now and then a little fresh air of my Keeper; or if my restraint had been maliciously straight or noisome, perhaps I might have found money, and borrowed wit for an (a) Vid. Explic.(a) escape: besides the reparations, I should have one day expected at the hands of those, who had any hand in such ugly abusings of me.

4ly, Since it is no farther from York to London, then from London to York, why may not Sir Jerome, &c. (since by my Civilities and Services they have been provoked to the most extravagant bitterness against me) be by the Rule of contraries, mitigated and sweetned (which were a pretty experiment) by the sharpness of these redargutions: for in Burns, we use to take out the fire, not with the most cooling Medicaments.

5ly, Two Souldiers fighting with their Pistols, he that has first discharged will not so willingly parley, before tother has fired too, as afterwards: Now Sir Jerome hath already defamed me, it is therefore but necessary, even in order to peace, that I should a little deride him: for till he thinks I am even with him, he'll never leave being at odds with me; but out of fear of worse then I intend him, he'll do me a second and third injury to disable me from revenging his first. Besides, I knew a friend of Sir Jeromes, who unprovoked, took an unhandsome freedome to traduce in print a Proposal made out of good intention to the publick; and being sharply handled for his labour, became afterwards very quiet.

6ly, I find a free and careless dealing with this Knight to be most proper: Nam Nimio Candore uti erga prava ingenia periculosum. Besides, none of his great provocations have hitherto forced me out of my usual patience, and contempt of his false and scurrilous dealings: for although this Knight in his first assault upon me in Parliament, did even fright the house with the description he gave of me; declaring, that never such wickedness, never such monstrous and hellish practices were used as by me; inciting them to all cruelty and hardship imaginable: yet I, in revenge, onely told the house, that this Knight was a person never famous for his Sagacity; that he was so shallow and transparent, that every one might without art or industry see through him; that he himself knew not what he went about; never so much as hinting, that Sir Jerome was capable of any deep hellish Plots, or that he held dangerous Principles, nor indeed that he stuck to any at all.

2ly, When he laboured to have me sent out of Ireland into England as a Prisoner, and like the enemy in the night sowed tares in my reputation, presented eleven scurrilous Articles to the Parliament against me, and that against his promise; and when he sought to exclude me the Act of Indempnity, &c. yet when I set out in print the brief of proceedings between us: I did not publish Sir Jeromes absurd, interrupted, unstarcht, hobling Speech, made in answer to mine in Parliament: I suppressed all the Tautalogical Ribaldry of the last eleven Articles; and in a way of pitying Sir Jerome, barely said, He was a man of small Conversation in the matters he laboured most about. Besides, I did several times move, (to th'end Sir Jerome might have time to repent) That he would chuse one of the very foulest and plainest matters that he had against me; and that he would take the help of his Python Worsley; proffering to put the whole upon the issue of that single point he should pitch upon; and withal, to let the same be tryed, even by the judgment of any whom his usurpt and abused Patron my Lord Fleetwood should nominate. And lastly, I offered, when we had so tryed the business here for the satisfaction of my Lord Fleetwood, (which I abundantly desired,) that in case I were cleared, yet to try over the same things again more judicially afterwards. But Sir Jerome, to reward all this my tenderness of him, refuses the motion, keeps off my tryal in Ireland, never so much as delivering the Articles, and the Parliaments Order of Reference unto the Referees appointed, yet sends me false Alarms to discompose my Affairs and Negotiations in England;Vid. Explic. and threatned, upon the Armies owning the Northern Brigades Proposals, promoted by himself, but distasted by the Parliament, to give me no quarter, &c. What remains therefore for me to do now, (when the Law is dead or asleep) but to call a Spade a Spade, and to give the world a Character of this giddy busie-body; of which this Letter to you, Sir, is but the first draught, being but a brief touch of some of his actings relating onely to my self; whereas in that other Picture intended for him, he shall be drawn and painted, not onely at length, but on horseback, with all his Squires about him: and it shall contain all his famous Atchievements from before his foot-ball-playing at Cambridge, to his last playing fast and loose with the Parliament.

To prepare myself for which work, I will read over Don Quixot once more; that having as good a subject of Sir Jerome as Michael de Cervantes had of him, something may be done not unworthy a representing next Bartholmew Fair.

Sir,

THe speed of writing this Answer, may have left some things in it misinterpretable, as to which I tell you: Whereas I have not onely here and there spoken slighty of Sankey and Worsley, but have also grated upon my Enemies, that I would not have you think that by enemies I mean all those that have at any time been angry with me, and desired to know and understand whether I had dealt well or not with them; but that by Enemies I meant the said Worsley and Sankey, with some few others, who have not onely evil hearts towards me, but designes also against the publick, and for themselves in these their undertakings.

As for the Anabaptists, (commonly so called) whom I supposed misled into a distance with me, I think I have said nothing that the wiser of them will take ill, having neither reproached their Religion, nor promiscuously taxed their persons, especially for what they did when in fear and under hatches: Perhaps those seven Gentlemen who took upon them to inspect me, may think themselves reflected upon, if ever you should let this Letter come abroad: But I assure you, Sir, that although I have no reason to make it my business to praise some of them, yet by Enemies and Prosecutors, I meant very few of them, thinking they did but their duty; and believing, That if Sir Jerome had let them and me alone, that long ere this I had satisfied them, and they had vindicated me.

As for the Army of Ireland, I do not remember I have said any thing which even Malice itself may wrest to their dishonour: for though they had been rough with me, I have no reason to take it ill, not onely because the business in question is their very great Concernment, and hath indeed been carried obscurely, (though God knows, by the backwardness of others in learning to understand it, rather then by any desire of mine to darken it) but also because I (who have received so many designed favours from them) ought not to be provoked with their casual and momentary frowns, and with the heats that particular persons have begate in them upon mistakes of the matter, which I could never yet come to discourse unto them: I say, I ought not to be, nor am I peevish at such their unkindnesses, nor should I be troubled at my own sufferings, did not that noble Army suffer an hundred times more, even by my sufferings, then I my self do; and that onely to feed the spleen and revenges of a few: for 'tis by this Army that I am what I am: they accepted my services as their Physitian, doubled my established pay, kept me up through all reducements, rejected a general Survey of their Lands (though above half finished) to embrace my extraordinary Proposals, thought projects; gave largely out of their own purses to encourage me; and after all clamours against my actings, chose me, yea contended to have me their Trustee for giving them their lots. They seemed to urge me to become a Fellow-Planter with them; did take it exceeding well a long time that I engaged upon Land on that accompt. Many of them propounded the giving me some lasting Memorial for my services for them. They intrusted me to plead their right with the Adventurers at London. Many more favours have they shewn unto me, which I shall rather remember then repeat: For all which I declare my thanks; assuring them, as in the presence of God, that I never studied any thing more affectionately, then to serve them with uprightness; nor that I am to this day conscious of the least voluntary action to the contrary: the which if any man could in an amicable way make appear, I do again promise (as I have often already done) to make them a Zacheus-like restitution, to the utmost farthing of my Talent.


  1. "Apozeme": decoction; "Julep": pleasant-tasting liquid medicine in which other nauseous medicines are taken. (Wikisource ed.)
  2. "tonitruating and fulgurating": thundering and lightning. (Wikisource ed.)