The Genuine Remains in Verse and Prose of Mr. Samuel Butler/Volume 1/Miscellaneous thoughts—in Verse

The Genuine Remains in Verse and Prose of Mr. Samuel Butler
by Samuel Butler

Miscellaneous thoughts—in Verse

4257916The Genuine Remains in Verse and Prose of Mr. Samuel Butler — Miscellaneous thoughts—in VerseSamuel Butler (1612-1680)

Miscellaneous Thoughts.^[1]

All Men's Intrigues and Projects tend
By sev'ral Courses to one End,
To compass by the prop'rest Shows,
Whatever their Designs propose;
And that which owns the fair'st Pretext
Is often found the indirect'st.
Hence 'tis, that Hypocrites still paint
Much fairer, than the real Saint,
And Knaves appear more just and true,
Than honest Men, that make less Shew:
The dullest Idiots in Disguise
Appear more knowing than the wise;
Illiterate Dunces undiscern'd
Pass on the Rabble for the learn'd;
And Cowards, that can damn and rant,
Pas muster for the valiant.
For he, that has but Impudence,
To all Things has a just Pretence;
And, put among his Wants but Shame,
To all the World may lay his Claim.

How various and innumerable
Are those, who live upon the Rabble?
'Tis they maintain the Church and State,
Employ the Priest and Magistrate;
Bear all the Charge of Government,
And pay the public Fines and Rent;
Defray all Taxes and Excises,
And Impositions of all Prices;
Bear all th' Expence of Peace and War,
And pay the Pulpit and the Bar;
Maintain all Churches and Religions,
And give their Pastors Exhibitions,
And those, who have the greatest Flocks,
Are primitive and orthodox;
Support all Schismatics and Sects,
And pay 'em for tormenting Texts,
Take all their Doctrines off their Hands,
And pay 'em in good Rents and Lands;
Discharge all costly Offices,
The Doctor's and the Lawyer's Fees,
The Hangman's Wages and the Scores
Of Caterpillar Bawds and Whores;
Discharge all Damages and Costs
Of Knights and Squires of the Post,
All Statesmen, Cutpurses, and Padders,
And pay for all their Ropes and Ladders;
All Pettifoggers, and all Sorts
Of Mercats, Churches, and of Courts;
All Sums of Money paid or spent,
With all the Charges incident,
Laid out, or thrown away, or given
To purchase this World, Hell, or Heaven.

Should once the World resolve t'abolish
All that's ridiculous, and foolish,
It wou'd have nothing left to do,
T'apply in Jest or Earnest to,
No Business of Importance, Play,
Or State, to pass its Time away.

The World would be more just, if Truth and Lies,
And Right and Wrong did bear an equal Price;
But since Impostures are so highly rais'd,
And Faith and Justice equally debas'd,
Few Men have Tempers for such paltry Gains
T'undo themselves with Drudgery and Pains.

The sottish World without Distinction looks
On all that passes on th' account of Books;
And, when there are two Scholars, that within
The Species only hardly are a-kin,
The World will pass for Men of equal Knowledge,
If equally th' have loiter'd in a College.

Critics are like a Kind of Flies, that breed,
In wild Fig-trees, and when th' are grown up feed
Upon the raw Fruit of the nobler Kind,
And by their nibbling on the outward Rind
Open the Pores, and make Way for the Sun
To rip'n it sooner, than he wou'd have done.

As all Fanatics preach, so all Men write
Out of the Strength of Gifts and inward Light,
In Spite of Art, as Horses thorough pac'd
Were never taught, and therefore go more fast.

In all Mistakes the strict and regular
Are found to be the desp'ratst Ways to err,
And worst to be avoided, as a Wound
Is said to be the harder cur'd, that's round:
For Error and Mistake, the less th' appear,
In th' End are found to be the dangerouser;
As no Man minds those Clocks, that use to go
Apparently too over-fast, or slow.

The truest Characters of Ignorance
Are Vanity, and Pride, and Arrogance;
As blind Men use to bear their Noses higher,
Than those that have their Eyes and Sight entire,

The Metaphysic's but a Puppet Motion,
That goes with Screws, the Notion of a Notion,
The Copy of a Copy, and lame Draught
Unnaturally taken from a Thought;
That counterfeits all pantomimic Tricks,
And turris the Eyes like an old Crucifix;
That counterchanges whatsoe'er it calls
B' another Name, and makes it true or false,
Turns Truth to Falshood, Falshood into Truth
By Virtue of the Babylonian's Tooth

'Tis not the Art of Schools to understand,
But make Things hard, instead of b'ing explain'd;
And therefore those are commonly the learned'st,
That only study between Jest and Earnest:
For when the End of Learning's to pursue,
And trace the subtle Steps of false and true,
They ne'er consider how th'are to apply,
But only listen to the Noise and Cry;
And are so much delighted with the Chace,
They never mind the taking of their Preys.
More Proselites and Converts use t'accrue
To false Persuasions, than the right and true:
For Error and Mistake are infinite,
But Truth has but one Way to be i'th' right;
As Numbers may t' Infinity be grown,
But never be reduc'd to less than one.

All Wit and Fancy, like a Diamond,
The more exact and curious 'tis ground,
Is forc'd for every Caract to abate
As much in Value, as it wants in Weight.

All the Inventions, that the World contains,
Were not by Reason first found out, nor Brains;
But pass for theirs, who had the Luck to light
Upon them by Mistake, or Oversight.

↑ This, and the other little Sketches that follow, were among many of the same kind fairly wrote out by Butler in a sort of poetical Thesaurus, which I have before mentioned. Whether he intended ever to publish any of them, as separate distinct Thoughts, or to interweave them into some future Compositions, a Thing very usual with him, cannot be ascertained; nor is it, indeed, very material to those who are fond of his Manner of thinking and writing. I have ventured to give them the Title of Miscellaneous Thoughts; but I have not been over curious in placing them in any methodical order. Out of this Magazine he communicated to Mr. Aubrey that genuine Fragment printed in his Life, beginning
No Jesuit e'er took in Hand
To plant a Church in barren Land;
Nor ever thought it worth the while
A Swede or Russ to reconcile, &c.

The publishing of miscellaneous Thoughts, or what passes under the Name of Table-talk, might be justified by many Names of the greatest Authority in the learned World; and these Sallies of Wit, unconnectedly printed, sometimes give more Pleasure, than when they are interspersed in a long and regular Work; as it is often more entertaining to examine Jewels separately in a Cabinet, than to see them adorning a Prince's Crown, or a royal Robe. One may venture to add, that these of our Author must have a Kind of additional Recommendation by the agreeable Singularity of their being in Verse.

[p228-1] This, and the other little Sketches that follow, were among many of the same kind fairly wrote out by Butler in a sort of poetical Thesaurus, which I have before mentioned. Whether he intended ever to publish any of them, as separate distinct Thoughts, or to interweave them into some future Compositions, a Thing very usual with him, cannot be ascertained; nor is it, indeed, very material to those who are fond of his Manner of thinking and writing. I have ventured to give them the Title of Miscellaneous Thoughts; but I have not been over curious in placing them in any methodical order. Out of this Magazine he communicated to Mr. Aubrey that genuine Fragment printed in his Life, beginning
No Jesuit e'er took in Hand
To plant a Church in barren Land;
Nor ever thought it worth the while
A Swede or Russ to reconcile, &c.

The publishing of miscellaneous Thoughts, or what passes under the Name of Table-talk, might be justified by many Names of the greatest Authority in the learned World; and these Sallies of Wit, unconnectedly printed, sometimes give more Pleasure, than when they are interspersed in a long and regular Work; as it is often more entertaining to examine Jewels separately in a Cabinet, than to see them adorning a Prince's Crown, or a royal Robe. One may venture to add, that these of our Author must have a Kind of additional Recommendation by the agreeable Singularity of their being in Verse.

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