The Humorous Exploits of Mally Dyver/The Farmer's witty Remarks on the Dog-Tax

THE

TAX'D DOGS' GARLAND.

UPON the road, the other day,
I chanc'd to overtake, Sir,
Two country-men upon the road,
Who great complaint did make, Sir.

One of the two right mournful ſaid,
Oh! have you heard the news, Sir,
A heavy tax is laid on Dogs,
Which are of ſo great uſe, Sir.

Six Shillings now we all muſt pay,
If that a Dog we keep, Sir,
Poor people cannot this afford,
Tho' they ſhould loſe their ſheep, Sir,

l'm seventy years, or thereabout,
My neighbour's sixty-sax, Sir,
But never ſaw the like of this,
To lay on Dogs a tax, Sir.

Wow man, I think, there's mony ways,
To clear the nation's load, Sir,
Than to oppreſs a poor man ſo,
and tax his very Dog, Sir.

This morning, or I came frae hame,
I ſaw three Collies die, Sir,
Their owner's could not pay the tax,
Tho't had been but Shillings three, Sir.

O if they had but come to me,
Or yet to Madge, my wife, Sir,
This year's taxation we would pay'd,
To ſav'd their Collie's life, Sir.

My heart was was to ſee the brutes
ſhare fic untimely fate, Sir,
The country ſure muſt be right poor,
when thus they uphold the state, Sir.

There's mony Dngs, I frankly own,
That's uſeleſs for to keep, Sir;
But country Collies uſeful are,
For herding of our ſheep, Sir.

My Collie is an unco beaſt,
And meikle ſenſe he has, Sir,
And when the ſheep ſtrays o'er far aff,
He gi’es them mony a chaſe, Sir.

I canna want my Collie dog,
Mair than meat to my wime, Sir;
For turning either horſe or nout,
He is a hunter fine, Sir.

He never hunts them by the head,
But ay grips at their heels, Sir;
And gathers ſafely a' the flock,
When running thro' the fields, Sir.

He's careful o' the houſe at night,
And when that any ill, Sir,
Is likely for to come on me,
He barks baith loud and ſhrill, Sir.

Were't not for him the robbers ſure
Would take from me my gear, Sir;
But Collie gi'es a lively bark,
When dauger it is near, Sir.

At kirk or fair there's ne'er a dog,
Wi' Collie can compare, Sir;
The other day, upon the road,
He catch'd a running hare Sir.

It's very right that uſeleſs Dogs
Should pay a handſome tax, Sir;
Each one ſhould twenty ſhillings pay,
If Collies muſt pay fax, Sir.

The happy time will yet arrive,
I hope the time to fee, Sir,
When uſeleſs Dogs will all be hang'd,
And Collie Dogs gae free, Sir.

FINIS.

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[T. Johnſton, Printer, Falkirk. 1802 ]

Where a good Assortment of Pamphlets may be (illegible text) in Wholeſale on the loweſt terms.