Punch number one is when the director picks out Rags and Judy for the leading parts in the play. That floored me, but I got up. Punch number two is when Judy comes into dinner from rehearsal one night, all excited and acting like she's just got word that a rich uncle died and left her everything but Baffin's Bay. I ask her what seems to be the trouble, and after stalling a bit she finally says the director has told her she's a born actress and is throwing herself away by staying in Drew City. What she should do, this parsnip tells her, is to go to New York, where he's satisfied her talent will get her attention. I leave it to you what this done to me!"
"The big stiff!" I says. "I suppose he likewise asked you could he call on you some night and give you more details about going on the stage in New York, hey? I'll go around there and slap him silly!"
"You'll do nothing of the sort!" says Judy, flaring right up. "Mr. De Haven is a perfect gentleman and I think it's wonderful he should take such an interest in me!"
"Ain't we got fun?" I says, fit to bite nails. "What did you tell him when he invited you to bust into the show business?"
"Don't cross-examine me, Gale," says Judy. "I said I would think it over. I certainly don't intend to be a stenographer all my life!"
"I don't expect you to be one all your life, either, Judy." I says. "But please don't go on the stage. That would just about murder me, no fooling! Why, the mere thought of you being a actress is"
