Account of the particular soliloquies and covenant engagements, of Mrs. Janet Hamilton (1801)/Second covenant
Covenant Engagements &c,
The second dated at
Ealston, January, 1691.
Lord, thou knowest my former engagements which past betwixt my soul and thee, when I entered into covenant with thee (to my soul's great comfort) in the sweet Castle of Blackness.—I giving myself up unto thee, promising to be for thee in my station, adhering to thy sacred scriptures, and to our noble work of reformation, which was then the head of my sufferings, and for which I had lost the favour of my relations and christian friends, whose untenderness to me made me sit solitary, eating the bread of adversity, and drinking the water of affliction killed all the day long with sore and heavy reproaches; few or none to sympathize with me but thyself, who sweetened all my trials with the soul comforting consolations of thy Holy Spirit: such contentedness thou gave me in thy sweet cross, that I never knew what it was for to weary.—I at that time engaged to endure what ingredients thou shouldest put in my cup to drink, and to drink cheerfully and submissively.—Such was thy love to me, that thou brought me from under the feet of that cruel enemy, without wronging truth; and hast letten me see, that I have nothing to boast of—it being nothing in me but ever free grace that perfected strength in my weakness. O that I had the tongue of the learned, that I might shew all thy praises! It was not I but thou who magnified thy power, in carrying a poor weak thing thro' such depths, and suffered great ones to stagger and fall in the way—Thy word was made out in making use of the foolish things of the world to confound the wise.—Thou hast made thy infinite love to carry thro' a poor finite creature.
How often have I been made to stand and wonder, and admire free love; knowing my own weakness, and the many infirmities I am liable to, by a body of sin and death: such was thy love, that thou gave me such courage, that neither the flattering of friends nor the threats of enemies could move me to do any thing to truth's disadvantage! Such was thy love to me! O thy sweet cross! thy yoke was mad easy to me, and thy burden light. O that any should fear at thy schoolinstructing rods! How many lessons of Christianity are to be learned under thy rod! So much comfort and consolation is to be found in quietly and calmly acquiescing to his will, that I may say, I shall never have such contentedness, were I to be inheritor of the whole world, as I had under the sweet cross of Christ. O praises! praises to him who made it so!———But with what a heavy heart did I come out of that castle of Blackness! The Lord did give me such a fight of the intricate dispensations that the Church was to meet with, by the coming of the Prince of Orange, that instead of being compast about with songs of deliverance, it was attended with great heaviness: I could take pleasure in nothing, but mourning over the sad things I saw coming on the Church. When others were rejoicing, I durst not make mention of my disconsolate case. When they spake of preferment to my family, it was as a sword to my heart, I cried, and the Lord heard me in that; and instead of that, he gave me the assurance of the salvation of my dear child William, and gave me full submission to his sickness, which I could never win to before,—accompanied with many sweet melting days, which was to me an inexpressible mercy. Oh, then! what did I see next? The work of God betrayed, not by enemies, nor by that party only that had sitten at their ease, but by those ministers and people that had jeoparded their lives in the, high places of the fields, taking chearfully the spoiling of their goods;—these are they that have buried the work of the Lord, saddened the hearts of their poor afflicted brethren, buried the Covenant and the Reformation work, which was the glory of our land.
Seeing all this with the home-coming to my house, which I thought I never would have enjoyed again till Christ had been restored to his rights; for, O Lord, thou knowest, that I desired not delivery till it had come with Zion's: I say, this cast me into a great grief. Lord, thou knowest my burden: it is not hid from thee, and it is all my comfort. O the depths of the intricate dispensations I have been trysted with, since I came out of that foresaid Castle! If it were not that my case and Zion's is somewhat levelled alike, surely I would sink beneath the stream; but, the cup which my father hath given me, shall I not drink it? Lord, help me, that I weary not before it be at an end.
Would it not affect any soul that ever had any love to Christ, to see the sad fruit of a personal delivery;—every one running out of the furnace after the world, and after his own rights and privileges, without being concerned to enquire how Christ is invested in his rights and prerogatives. Oh! is this the gratitude we have shewn him for all his loving kindnesses to us in the wilderness! Is this for his feeding, clothing, and preserving in despight of enemies! Is this all we have rendered to him—to run as so many sheep out of a fold, every one to what he could win at, without ever looking and considering what was their duty to do in such a time for Christ and his cause! O! wrath is gone out against us! Plague upon plague is the portion for professors of this generation! O Lord, I fear I, and many others, have been building upon a sandy foundation; suffering more out of an expectation of a temporal delivery, than out of love to Christ and his cause! the event of the sufferings of Scotland speaks out the truth of this,—the sight whereof has made my heart to tremble. Therefore, O Lord, I desire that thou wouldest uncover the deceit of my heart in this, with a true sense of it upon my spirit, that I may mourn in secret places for it. O! give me thy assisting grace and helping hand in this reeling, fainting, and falling time, that I may be helped, in singleness and uprightness of heart, and in sincerity without hypocrisy or guile, to lay that foundation stone right, which is Jesus Christ. O come and give thy consent to this covenant and bargain this day: let thy presence shew thy satisfaction in it, that I may win to the faith—that not only I have covenanted with thee, but that thou hast condescended in thy infinite love to covenant with me, and hast made it sure in every thing.—Now, Lord, I desire to enter into covenant with thee this day, in opposition to all the corruptions of a body of sin and death that I am mastered with:- desire, in thy fight, to protest a gainst all things in me, or in my family, that is not like thee—and, this day, to invite thee back to my house on any terms, -and do not break us with thy long absence.—Come, Lord Jesus, and take up thy dwelling amongst us—we are, a heartless company without thee.—Come to the heads, and tell us what is duty, and our duty; and put work in our hands. Aft thou passing by us, as one that hath no more work for us to do? O Lord, I cannot think upon this; let not our iniquities put a stop in thy way: come over the mountains of opposition, and put us to duty, and keep us at duty, and dwell with us. I invite thee to come to my poor babes; let them be of the little children that thou suffers to come unto thee. Salvation to him that appears to be near his close: let him have mercy in, and thro' a compleat Mediator Christ; let thy sympathy and free love be extended towards him, -he being one of thy sufferers, wanting the administration of thy Sacrament of Baptism, because of the unfaithfulness of ministers. Lord, thou knowest, that it was not in contempt of thy holy ordinance that it was wanting; but we could not, in our station, shew in a more eminent way our dislike to the injuries done to thee, O Lord, by unfaithful ministers: all their treachery is well known unto thee. Lord, break the snares, and let thy poor flock escape; and hasten the day when my kids shall feed beside the shepherd's tents. invite thee this day to every soul within my family; let the work of grace be amongst them all.—every one encouraging another in the way of duty, that we may be a little sanctuary for thee to dwell in.—I invite thee, O Lord, this day to return to poor covenanted Scotland; altho' she has broken covenant with thee, yet thou must not give up with her. Remember thy former loving kindness to her, and, for thine own name's sake, return, return, and deliver. Are not enemies rejoicing, that they have gotten of the sons and daughters of Zion to help them to lay on the grave-stone, to hold down the work? Are not enemies crying, Where is the covenanted God of Scotland,—and saying, If this work had been of God, it would have food: So that all the blood of thy people, and the cause of God for which they suffered, is now buried, with the mockery of some and joy of others. But thou, who art the lion of the tribe of Judah, rouse up thyself, and let it be known to nations, that the covenanted God of Scotland lives and reigns! O that the resurrection of thy buried work were more glorious than ever! Let Zion's walls be built again, so that she may Be beautiful as Tirza, comely as Jerusalem, fair as the Moon, clear as the Sun, and terrible as an Army with banners: so that her enemies may tremble; and her children, who for a long time have been mourning over her rubbish, may rejoice in her comely order, and be compassed about with songs. I invite thee to the poor betrayed scattered societies in Scotland, that thou art now justly contending with. The marks of thy displeasure are evidently to be seen in every meeting; an absent God in every piece of duty, love and tenderness much gone; heart-burnings and contendings and lukewarmness breed nothing like a practical work among the most part, or making any progress in the way of Christianity: Is not all this come upon us, because our God is not amongst us! O that thou, o Lord, wouldest return and make known for what thou art contending, and remove their spiritual plagues, and let thy spirit be poured out among the sinners in Zion, and let them again behold the King's face in peace.—I desire to invite thee to every afflicted and wearied soul that is tost, and like to faint on the dark mountains, passing thro' dark steps, and none to speak comfortably unto them, but every one adding grief to grief. Lord, appear thou for their help, and shorten these days for the elect's sake, lest they faint under the burden, and put forth their hands to iniquity.—I desire this day to covenant with thee, in opposition to all the power civil, and ecclesiastic, that has eaten out the life of Christianity, and stands in opposition to thee and thy precious truths,—and engage never to own them, till they be for thee. This I engage, in the strength of the Lord.
I adhere to all the truths of the Old and New Testaments, and to all the testimonies of thy people given by them for carrying on thy work.—I desire to adhere to the now buried covenants, and to all the work of reformation which is founded upon thy word. Lord, help a poor weak insufficient creature to hold by this vow; and in paying vows unto thee, I do this day give up my dear husband unto thee, and all my children, that thou mayest make them for thee, and em ploy them in thy service—be the hazard what it will.
O Lord, take them off my hand, that they may be marked in thy love in that day when thou goest thro' the land with the devouring sword; let them get their souls for a prey, and be found within the bonds of the everlasting covenant. This is all my desire—grace in exercise be their portion.
I do this day solemnly enter into covenant with thee, Holding up my Hands, vowing to be thine, giving up myself unto thee, closing with thee on thine own terms, begging thee to come and put to thy seal to this great work: and I desire that this covenant may be as a staff to hold me up from staggering on the dark mountains. Lord, help me to have a practice in sincerity, like one in covenant with thee. O LORD, I do take the Stones in the wall, and the Timber of the House, to witness, that I have given up myself, and all mine, unto thee, O Lord, this day. As witness my hand,
At Earlston,Sic Subscribitur,
Jan. 1691.
