For other versions of this work, see To R. K..
A takeoff on Rudyard Kipling, referencing the popular works of H. Rider Haggard. First published in the Cambridge Review, 29 January 1891, and later included in all editions of Lapsus Calami. In the third and subsequent editions it is followed immediately by "The Grand Old Pipe".
The quotation from Browning can be found in the fourth stanza of 'Waring'.
1786714Lapsus Calami — To R. K.J.K.S.


To R. K.

As long I dwell on some stupendous
And tremendous (Heaven defend us!)
Monstr'-inform'-ingens-horrendous
Demoniaco-seraphic
Penman's latest piece of graphic.
Browning

Will there never come a season
Which shall rid us from the curse
Of a prose which knows no reason
And an unmelodious verse:
When the world shall cease to wonder
At the genius of an Ass,
And a boy's eccentric blunder
Shall not bring success to pass:

When mankind shall be delivered
From the clash of magazines,
And the inkstand shall be shivered
Into countless smithereens:
When there stands a muzzled stripling,
Mute, beside a muzzled bore:
When the Rudyards cease from kipling
And the Haggards Ride no more.

Cambridge Review, Feb. 1891.