Page:Free Opinions, Freely Expressed on Certain Phases of Modern Social Life and Conduct.djvu/144

THE AMERICAN BOUNDER

Everything in America is colossal, stupendous and pre-eminent,—it follows, therefore, that the American "bounder" is the most colossal, stupendous and pre-eminent bounder in existence. None of his tribe can match him in "brass,"—none of his European forbears or connections can equal him in brag. He is an inflated bladder of man, swollen out well-nigh to bursting with the wind of the Yankee Doodle Eagle's wing. His aim in life appears to be to disgrace his country by his manners, his morals and his conversation. He arrives in Europe with the air of laying Europe under a personal debt of obligation to Providence for having kindly permitted him to be born. As befits a son of the goddess Liberty, he sets his proud foot on the "worn out" soil of the Old World and prances there, even as the "wild ass" mentioned in Holy Writ. As a citizen of the greatest Republic over which any starred or striped flag ever flew, he extends his gracious patronage to tottering monarchies, and allows it to be understood that he tolerates with an amused compassion that poor, drivelling, aged and senile institution known as the Aristocracy. He alludes to "my friend the Duke," casually, as one might speak of a blind beggar. He throws in a remark quite