Page:The Pilgrim's Progress, the Holy War, Grace Abounding Chunk3.djvu/86

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Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners.

I shall know that thou canst discern the most secret thoughts of the heart.

241. I had no sooner said; it in my heart but her pangs were taken from her, and she was cast into a deep sleep, and so continued till morning. At this I greatly marvelled, not knowing what to think; but after I had been awake a good while, and heard her cry no more, I fell asleep also. So when I awaked in the morning, it came upon me again, even what I had said in my heart the last night, and how the Lord had showed me that he knew my secret thoughts, which was a great astonishment unto me for several weeks after.

242. Well, about a year and a half afterwards that wicked, sinful thought of which I have spoken before went through my wicked heart, even this thought, Let Christ go if he will. So when I was fallen under guilt for this, the remembrance of my other thought and of the effect thereof would also acme upon me with this retort, which also carried rebuke along with it, Now you may see that God doth know the most secret thoughts of the heart.

243. And with this, that of the passages that were betwixt the Lord and his servant Gideon fell upon my spirit. Now because that Gideon tempted God with his fleece, both wet and dry, when he should have believed and ventured upon his words, therefore the Lord did afterwards so try him as to send him against an innumerable company of enemies, and that too, as to outward appearance, without any strength or help. (Judges vi., vii.) Thus he served me, and that justly; I, should have believed his word, and not have put an IF upon the all-seeingness of God.

244.And now to show you something of the advantages that I also have gained by this temptation. And first, by this I was made continually, to possess in my soul a very wonderful sense both of the blessing and glory of God, and of his beloved Son. In the temptation that went before, my soul was perplexed with unbelief, I, blasphemy, hardness of heart,