Translation:The Mysterious Individual/X
As his strength increased, the patient recovered more and more of his memories. By now he was permitted to risk the odd visit to the living room or drawing room, where the whole company was sometimes assembled, though only for short spells at first. On the first such occasion Kronenberg almost fainted when he was obliged to participate in the conversation and contribute to various discussions on diverse subjects. The whole family, which he now knew, was present; Cecilia was sitting alone at a window, and once again shone on him like an apparition; the second daughter, blonde and plump and always cheerful, was playing chess with a grumpy old foreign officer. Her mother explained to the invalid that this was primarily to keep the wicked Commandant who lived in the castle in a good mood. The Countess, busy with her work, was talking with a musician, a friend of the family, who often came to visit and, being a witty friend, who had become almost necessary to the family, especially in these troubled times. Her husband was walking back and forth, and often spoke with a quiet young man, a distant relative of the family, to whom Cecilia also paid much attention, whilst the musician often gazed at him askance with a wry look.
Naturally, everyone congratulated the convalescent, and the many thanks and emotions which he had to reciprocate, the many concerns he had to acknowledge, even of the complete strangers, all this so exhausted him that he could barely muster the energy necessary for the effort. They did not consider that the greatest courtesy they could pay the enfeebled man would be to allow him to rest. He was finally removed almost by force, and the Countess said, half jokingly:
— You must excuse my dear old brother; he certainly claims the privileges of family a bit too much; one must indulge him in his old age.
As Kronenberg's visits to the drawing room became more protracted, he noticed — all his senses having been sharpened by illness and lengthy isolation — that the young relative Emmerich was trying to conceal a passion for Cecilia, all the more so now that the musician was keeping him under close observation; Cecilia seemed to be avoiding her lovers with a certain anxiety, and she took advantage of the first opportunity that arose to sit down quite familiarly with the invalid and to speak with him earnestly and at length. In this conversation she deployed the allure of a beautiful mind, the emotion of a heart that had not yet found someone whom it could fully take into its confidence. Kronenberg felt embarrassed because he could not conceive how he had come to deserve this privilege; but life had never been so good to him. The junior officer approached them too and spoke kindly to Kronenberg, as if he had known him for many years. Cecilia seized the first opportunity to leave. When the musician joined the conversation and spoke acrimoniously of the members of the family, Kronenberg became uneasy and begged to be excused. But everything soon took a new twist, for just then adjutants galloped up to the castle and announced that the Marshal, who was passing through, would be staying there for the night. The officers went to meet him, the lord of the house was summoned. Everything was set in motion; and after some time a stately man appeared, who greeted the Count and Countess politely and in a gentlemanly manner and led the latter to the table, as dinner was just then being served. His behaviour was so refined that he caused no-one to feel embarrassed; on the contrary, they all felt more comfortable than they usually did; everyone was more unabashedly cheerful, even more amiable, than they would otherwise have been. When the diners rose from table, Kronenberg took advantage of the general confusion to retire unobserved to his lonely room. Exhausted, he threw himself down on the bed and reflected on his peculiar situation. Never before had life dealt him so much weal and woe: it seemed to him as though he had never before had any dealings with real people; all his former acquaintances and friends appeared to him as nothing more than hollow pupae, whom he did not understand and who did not understand him, and whom it was not even worthwhile trying to understand. He felt as though he was only now being awakened from a deep sleep that had up till then tightly bound all his senses. While the kindness of other people had seemed to be nothing more than a forced grimace, he was now learning to feel for the first time what trust, faith and love really were.
— And yet, his reflections continued, this is perhaps only my illness talking, showing me things in this light; when I am fully recovered I may think differently, and pedantically put my present understanding down to overexcitement. And can I, then, acquire this tender love, this gracious complaisance? Does that not, in fact, require one to wear a false mask, to become a stranger? How agonising is my condition that I am not permitted to be the person I would like to be, now that my better powers have awakened!
Whilst he was chastising himself like this, and as a wistfulness took possession of his whole being, he heard a quiet rustling at his door, which he had locked. Presently, a key was turned, cautiously but not without making some noise, and the door opened. Hidden by a screen, Kronenberg had a clear view of the whole room. The old relative, whose tenderness that day had been such a nuisance to him, entered gingerly.
— He must be still downstairs with everybody, he whispered to himself.
He looked around warily; then he walked over to the wardrobe, opened the drawers and rummaged amongst the linen and the few books. The valise, which was lying in the corner, did not escape his attention; but it was empty, he found.
— He has indeed, he said to himself again, damned few possessions with him: if my brother-in-law hadn't put his money aside, one could easily mistake him for a poor fellow. And no wallet! No papers! No strongbox!
He repeated his search, and when he could discover absolutely nothing else, he left with a murmur of dissatisfaction. — Kronenberg, who had watched this unexpected visit with mute astonishment, reflected on its significance for a long time, until a beneficent slumber finally freed him from these and all other considerations.
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