Act 3. Scene 1.
Jolly, Aurelia.
Joll.'Tis true, Aurelia, the Story they all agree in; 'twas nothing but a simple Plot o' the two Lovers to put me in fear o' death, in hope to work then upon my good Nature, or my Conscience, and Quack conspired with them out o' revenge; 'Twas a cursed Rogue though to give me such an unmerciful Dose of Scammony! It might ha' prov'd but an ill jest; but however, I will not be a loser by the business, ere I ha' done with't.
Aur.Me-thinks there might be something extracted out of it.
Joll.Why so there shall; I'le pretend, Aurelia, to be still desperately sick, and that I was really poison'd, no man will blame me after that, for whatsoever I do with my Niece. But that's not all, I will be mightily troubled in Conscience, send for the Widow, and be converted by her, that will win her heart, joyn'd with the hopes of my swallowing Lucia's portion.
Aur.For that point I'l assist you, Sir, Assure her that my Cousin Lucia is married privately this after-noon to Mr. Puny.
Joll.I would she were, Wench, (for thine and my sake) her Portion would be forfeited then indeed, and she would ha' no great need of't, for that Fop's very rich.
Aur.Well, Sir, I'l bring sufficient proofs of that, to satisfie the Widow, and that's all you require; be pleas'd to let the secret of the business rest with me yet a while, to morrow you shall know't. But for my own part, Sir, if I were in your place, I'd rather patiently lose my Estate for ever, than take't again with her.
Joll.Oh! hold your self contented, good frank-hearted Aurelia; would I were to marry such a one every week these two years: see how we differ now?
Aur.Bless us! what humming and hawing will be i' this house! what preaching, and houling, and fasting, and eating among the Saints! Their first pious work will be to banish Fletcher and
Ben Johnson out o'the Parlour, and bring in their rooms Martin Mar-relate, and Posies of Holy Hony-suckles, and a Sawf-box for a Wounded Conscience, and a Bundle of Grapes from Canaan. I cann't abide 'em; but I'l break my sister Tabitha's heart within a month one way or other. But, Sir, suppose the King should come in again, (as I hope he will for all these Villains) and you have your own again o' course, you'd be very proud of a Soap-boylers Widow then in Hide-park, Sir.
Joll.Oh! then the Bishops will come in too, and she'l away to New-England; well, this does not do my business; I'l about it, and send for her.
[Exit.
[Exit.
Enter Ralph.
Aur.And I'l about mine; Ralph, did you speak to Mr. Puny to meet me an hour hence at the back-dore in the Garden? he must not know the estate the house is in yet.
Ralph.Yes, forsooth, he bad me tell you, he'd no more fail you than the Sun fails Barnaby-day, I know not what he means by't, but he charg'd me to tell you so, and he would bring (forsooth) his Regiment of five hundred. He's a mad man, I think.
Aurel.Well, did you speak to Mr. Soaker to stay within too, the little Deacon that uses to drink with Will and you?
Ral.Yes, forsooth, he's in the Buttery.
Aur.Pray Heaven he don't forget my Instructions there! But first I have a little trick for my Lovers to begin withall, they shall ha' twenty more before I ha' done with 'em.
[Exit:
[Exit: